And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Randomize
