Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
More tranny stories later!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Randomize
