I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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