I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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