i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
