I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Randomize
