She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
