I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
No I am not eating basil off your cock
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Randomize
