In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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