OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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