So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
