Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
