she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Randomize