Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
