we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
