Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
