please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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