Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
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