You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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