..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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