you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
