I just made out with a guy for $7.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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