girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
