so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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