I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
