Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
i think i just lost a toe
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
