she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize