I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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