If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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