I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
