If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize