Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
