It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize