If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
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