Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
