rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Randomize