Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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