My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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