who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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