if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
