so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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