After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Randomize
