No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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