Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
