What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Dick very happy bro
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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