miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
