It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Randomize
