We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
She swung at the pinata with crutches
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
