yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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