At least make sure they are 18
Why
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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